Mindboggling Mind

I wonder...waiting to see a recovered patient struggling to recover. . It's not a wrong statement...its right. The games the mind plays is tricky.

With reduced mobility due to the process of recovery, the immobile mind is only at work. The forced physical immobility mobilizes the rested mind and lets it take over other parts of the body. This is a forced situation...with no option while at recovery. This does not amaze me. What intrigues me is the mind of the perfectly (so called) sane medically certified homosapien.

Mind is a matter of choice for the sane. So, if you make a decision or choose to make one ...why regret? This incident in my life literally dried the small little ocean of trust I had in my belief about friends in life. I still truly believe that friends for me is only the 6 of them. They do exist...they make me happy and they make me sad. But they don't have weird, unrealistic, unreasonable and illogical minds. The 6 from the FRIENDS I watch on TV.
My life has been sans friends. I am a closed book and don't regret not being a friend to anyone. I am a loner and prefer to be it. Its my choice. A small thought made me wonder ... about my closed life. I progressed...and tried to be a friend. I paid a price for a reason of my friend's own choice. I was a listener and watched it unfold and happen....and my friend walked away. What did I do? Being my own apologetic self, I tried to think if I erred. Did I? I wonder? I only wanted a friend. As everyone says... a friend is one who you can talk to, fight with, scold, beat, go around with and then be betrayed by. My sane mind has reasoned the unreasonable friend and refuses to believe in anything like friends in real life. I believe people are just acquaintances in life...the ones on this land that we meet when we walk the road of life.

The illusion of the friend I had is just a hallucination of my mind. I progressed... so I think. I will not regret not making an effort to make a friend. I made and failed. So be it, friends forever...is a wonderfully embellished phrase for an acquaintance.

Long live the friend. The friend is dead.

Where to go??

The spray of twilight, the colors of the setting sun.

The homing birds, the blowing wafts.

I know not where to go.



The untouched dew, the clear morning air.

The new chaos of the day, the flitting engines.

The whiff of freshness, the hurried monotony of routine.

I know not where to go.



The walk of life, the stealth of silence,

The tranquility of the unseen,

I know now where to go

Morals at work again. Look who is talking.

Albeit I do not want to entertain the Indian politician in my blogspot... i cannot resist. They are the biggest bunch of atrociously hypocritic and ridiculously jobless lot. With the IPL in full swing they, the Mumbai politicos, seem to have time and enough and more of it to police morals. They are up against cheer leaders.

THey may be dressed a little too loud for the so called moral politicians, but then why do they worry about using Devnagri script, the clothes one wears, the language one uses when there is rape, looting, dacoity, bribery, killing, poverty and much more under their nose? DOes it require a skimpy clad girl to call their attention? May be if a skimpily clad girl stands with a hoarding outside a slum they might then rise to the occasion. beats me.

All you people who want to be rich and famous... here is an idea.

merrily, merrily, merrily.......

I signed an eternal bond of relationship and clutched on to the strings of life the moment I was born. I now feel the tug. Far away in a land of opportunities I wake up every night to unsounding calls. Calls of emotions.

I wonder how strong a virtual string could be. the bonds of emotion, the strings of life, the realities of realtionships... is all so ethereal. I wonder. Is it a dream? Reminds of the song I learnt as a kid.... merrily merrily merrily merrily, life is but a dream.

My blog seems to be my hidden mind. something I can never express orally, all seem to find a place here. It's not a place to vent, but a place where I think I can talk and attach my mind.

Life is running so fast and my inability to keep up to the genuine and essential necessities of life ties me down. I ran away. Ran away so far away from my bonds and emotions... that I rarely visit them. As far as I seem to run though.... they seem to encounter me with a surprise.... a surprise that reminds me merrily that Life is but a dream.

Breeding Ignorance

It amazes me to learn how fast people can pretend ignorance about oneself. I have moved to another country to reap the benifits of the opportunity available. But in any sense it did not diminish the respect I have for my country. India, the land I was born is unique - the growth, the stagnation of growth, the mushrooming population, the poverty, the richness, the culture, the education....it's all something I cherish.

My conversations with many a Indian so called 'relatives' here has only reiterated how a country can inject a catalyst of ignorance that people conviniently pretend their unawareness about a country that got them here. Has the prominent quality of being part of the 'big brother' made them so much AMerican that they dont know their neighbouring state?

This reminds me of my classmate, a very outgoing young american girl, who thought India was a land of 'Alladins" .... with snakes and elephants roaming the streets, and houses in the wilderness. She was with me at Graduate school. Beats me. I, while in India was aware of he American politics, British, the chaos in the Middle East. And so were those Indians before they moved to the dollar land. And in around 5 years time they tend to think India is where they left it.

I understand the level of convinience people are offered in the US of A. But dosent mean you go back to your small town in your country and wonder where there elevators are. It makes me roll with laughter at the exhibition of such ignorance that I get to sink my ear into. The resident aliens in the America tend to willingly brandish their ignorance about India as part of their Americanization. The avalability of such Indians is not scarce.

The growth of a country depends on its people and American while attracting and breeding the ignorant will only grow towards being an uneducated and unaware nation.

It's 2 yeas now. And my stay in Amrica (Gujju style) hasn't changed me much. I still like green chillies, peppers as I am forced to call them now, the masala dosa, the preparation of which is now a festival, the beautiful cotton tops - now a celebrated wear for a couple of summer months, people I live in Northeast USA...and the whiff of Indian food, the want to wear a kholapuri chappal in December, the craving to go out for a long walk in march and so on....is obvious.

My breakfasts are now coffee and a slice of bread and my snack a cookie. M

....one of my incomplete blogs... that i want to publish to go back in time a little.

Indian Politics.....

has now become a stage to dress down a contestant. It been lurking in my mind, but now despise its presence in the inner self and want words to decorate its wreath of anonimity in the open.

Now we see a lady candidate for president of the world's biggest democray and the opposition or the so called scandal or publicity hungry "representatives of the people" are all busy. Busier than ever to dig events and unnecessary moments to tarnish the image of the contenstant.

I am not for a person or a party, but for a more unbiased stage for election of a candidate to the post of the president of the largetst democracy. The irony, the President has to be a unbiased and neutral candiate who in real is not vested with much power to rule. hmmm all this skimmerish for what I wonder? Is the ever increasing population in the country creating a lot more publicity hungry people? I wonder. What has happend to the educated lot in the country? Or are the educated lot a part of the bigger group who like me are mere viewers of this real theater....